Letter from Dr. Gluttony Fraudci

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< Windsor Freedom Rally 2022-01-22
To be read at an anti-lockdown freedom rally.
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Dear Freedom Fighters,

While I marvel at your resilience and appreciate your fervour I must concede I am perplexed by your endless persistence. Why do you continue to stand in the cold and rally against oppression and tyranny?

Look around, most people are comfortable and sound asleep. Does that not sound inviting? Why swim upstream? Why go against the grain? Why fight the inevitable?

Haven't you seen the future in Star Trek, "Resistance is futile." I love that show. Believable science.

We all knew the goalposts have to keep moving because the narratives we spin keep evolving. Honestly, that's basic science. If you don't trust me then trust the fact-checkers that despite their checkered past, check the facts, honestly.

Sure, there may be some rare side effects, but we have an entire "health"care establishment and big pharma industry with outstretched arms, eagerly anticipating your valued business. We promise to treat you as fairly too the bitter end as we would our own mothers. I loved my mother despite how much she twisted me up inside.

Every time a child receives an experimental injection an angel cries, for joy, I'm told.

All of brainwashed society hates you because their blind faith in authority makes them like mindless children, except most parents actually care for their children.

Oh, the guilt you unvaxxed must be suffering. It might even corrupt your thoughts into thinking your leaders were to blame, but that can't be true because all the experts agree for the first time in history.

Think about how simple life could be again when all the sheeple flockdown is over.

If you would just take your jab we could all move on to fighting climate change with carbon taxes.

If you would just take your jab we could all be equal despite our race and genders.

If you would just take your jab we could all just get on with our lives.

We promise, this time, again, for realzies.

In science we trust,

Ever benevolent,

~ Dr. Gluttony Fraudci

P.S. Sorry about that whole AID$ mess.

P.P.S. Don't look into VAID$. Nothing to see there.